I’d like to ask you all to hang in there for a little bit. No, that wasn’t the purpose of this photo. No corny jokes intended. I guess I meant it more as some sort of metaphorical image; something along the lines of, “what you really want is just out of reach.” I’m finding myself in some kind of transitory limbo, realizing that I’m not happy where I am, but uncomfortable with the idea of really pursuing what I know will make me happy. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s a fear of the consequences along the way, or the fear of constantly chasing happiness. Maybe it’s something else. But I’ve decided to do something about it, and I hope that the end result will turn out much better than the current situation I’m in. I’ll find out Monday.

To be a little more specific without sharing too much, I’m having some personal issues with food in my living situation. Wow, what else is new? But as I’ve shared before on this blog, I’ve always had sort of a skewed relationship with food. I finally feel like I’m overcoming some of those issues and realizing what’s important to me, food-wise, for my physical and emotional health. I need whole foods, fresh foods, real foods. I need to be able to speak for my body if I know it doesn’t want something. Yes, I’m a vegetarian here, not a vegan. The purpose of that transition was to really try to experience the French culture, something I’m finding hard to do in the current situation I’m in. I have grown to distrust processed foods, however high quality they may be, and there’s no turning back. I can’t put something into my body that I know doesn’t belong there. And I find that in cases like this, my physical health often impacts my mental health– if my body’s not happy, then I’m not happy. And that can be hard.

I’ll keep you updated in the coming week, but it’s been hard thinking of other things when I’m really just waiting until Monday to figure this situation out. I had a really great day yesterday, and hope to share more of that in the upcoming week. But for right now, like I said, I’m sort of in limbo.

And hopefully, if things go well, there’ll be a lot more cooking posts on here!

Thanks for understanding.